How long do you lay in bed wide awake unable to sleep? First it was trying to find that comfortable position, then it was my racing mind, interrupted by my son asking if the storms were finally done and why can't it be tomorrow yet. Yes, I'd like it to be tomorrow too, only after a good night's sleep that I am obviously not receiving.
I had a positive mindset on tonight. Dropped off my kids for their supervised visit with their dad, then drove into the city to get my oil changed on my minivan. If it took the normal 45 minutes, I'd still have time to get dinner, read and journal about how well I'm doing 14 years after the day I got married. I was optimistic, upbeat and didn't believe we'd actually get rain tonight let alone storms. It hasn't rained in our part of the state for I believe over 20 days now. The last two times it appeared in the forecast it completely missed us. So I get to the service center and the man check my miles, etc asks if I noticed my flat tire. No, obviously I hadn't or I would have brought it up, but I say kindly, no I didn't, is it possible for you to take care of that too? Then he shows me that the treads are so low in the front, but worse here in the back. To quote him, "You can't get much smoother than this unless your touching a baby's bottom." Odd, but okay time to look at my book and enjoy the free coffee in the waiting area. The man that then came over to have me sign the release for the oil change work to be done explain too that the tires were really getting low on treads and that they won't make it until fall.
I am starting to read and slightly distracted by the commentary from the television show with the modern version of "The Family Feud" on nearby. The questions were just bizarre and I hadn't seen the show in years. "If you husband tells you he wants a divorce on Sunday, what do you do on Monday?" Really, that is a questions for the contestants? So I get out my cell phone as I'm too distracted at this point to read and retain anything that is on the page in front of me. I check email and then check in on Facebook to see a family's trampoline just blew away. Then more comments about the rain, what a blessing, but the storms unwanted along with it. I finally called my parents that now live in the same town I do and asked them if the rain had let up, as my minivan was going to be done soon. They were, but the winds were up to 70 miles per hour, blowing the roof off of the neighbors play structure and knocking over the trampoline from the house behind them. They had blown over flower pots, plants, lawn furniture and were concerned my son's basketball hoop and knocked down...asking me to call them when I did get home and let them know.
Soon enough, the man came over explaining the oil change was done but they couldnt' find a hole in the tire. He said they filled it and also noticed my front headlight was out. Really? I guess I haven't been driving at night much lately , but okay. He went back to find out more about the tire and to see if they replaced the headlight. It was taking awhile and the storms were now upon us, with a giant wall of windows to my right and a lady seated nearby quite concerned that a tornado was about to hit us. I called my friend in the next closest town to see if the storms had let up there yet, as I knew I had to drive right into them if I left now. She said it was pretty calm there, just rain. Then she asked how I was doing today, letting me know she was thinking of me as her kids and her cousins kids were at Olbrich Gardens were I was married 14 years ago today. She was there, my personal attendant, or rather my personal life savor. Yes, I was hanging in there, it really hadn't been too bad of a day, expect coming in tonight to discover a flat tire and now that I need new tires sooner than later. We talked about a few other things and I finally got off the phone, noticing the time and realizing if I didn't leave pretty soon, I wouldn't be home for my kids to be dropped off.
The service man then explained that they couldn't find any holes in the tire, but it's possible it's a slow leak from between were the seams are? Regardless, when I asked how much longer he thought I had on these tires, he pointed out that most people get new tires at the rating one better than I was at, that I definitely won't make it until fall and should probably get them done in the next month. Great, so the money is just going to rain down from the sky for those? Actually, I did come across, a couple days ago, the realization that the home equity loan I took out at that end of last year to pay off credit card debt, now has some money building up in the account. Not a lot yet, but hopefully enough to pay for these tires. So I try to remain optimistic and carefully as possible drive home on the almost flooded streets with my almost no tread tires.
As I drive into town finally, I stop in my local Walgreens to pick up milk for my son, as he lives on that stuff and I know we are out. As I pass the photo corner, my photo lady starts looking for my pictures as I stop her saying, "Nope, just milk today, but dont' worry I'm sure I'll be in sometime this next week, as I am actually waiting until I have enough for the latest sale coupon." Then I point out, as we usually chat, that I spent my entire 3 hours to myself at the car service reading storm update around here...I pointed out that at least two trampolines were taken by the winds... She thanks me for thinking of it and gets on the phone as I pass by with my milk and head to the main checkout, saying that she'd better call home and check to make sure theirs hasn't blown away!
I drive into my neighborhood, proud that I have 3 minutes to spare before 8:00PM and notice a few branches and leaves in the road. Then, as I turn the corner on my street I see our tree split down the middle, laying across the front yard into the sidewalk. I slow down to a stop and take a picture with my cell phone, saying to myself, seriously? Then, as I edge further and am about to round the corner into my driveway I think I lost my breath. The huge maple tree, the one my kids climb up in and watch for friends, it had completely split too, this one with it's branches on the roof of my house! SERIOUSLY I repeated once I caught my breath. I park the minivan, got out and stared in awe close up as I looked to see, not really wanting to see, if the kids bedroom windows were okay. Yes, they were...but I couldn't even see the roof. In disbelief, I think probably talking to myself out loud, are you serious? This can't be happening....I walked inside, scared and looked in both of my kids bedrooms, to see them both okay...then out the windows, as it was almost dark at this point, but I could see the gutter bowed a bit, that was it from that view. I went back outside and quickly started to take pictures with my cell phone camera before it was completely dark. I called my good friend I was just talking to and as she asked if everything was okay, "Well, no, a tree fell on my house." I explained further and also explained my former mother-in-law would be dropping off the kids any movement and really should get off the phone. She said she'd pray for me, remaining incredibly calm and then a car pulled up. It was the neighbors a few doors down, asking if I was okay, if anyone was hurt. I explained I had just got home and both the puppy and kitty were fine inside. They said they saw the lightening strike up here, explaining how strong and then loud it was. The guessed it hit the first tree I had noticed, from the way the tree split, it probably had. As soon as they knew I was okay, they drove slowly off and before I knew it my kids were returning. I could hear them from inside as they slowly pulled up. I started saying before they even got out of her car, that their rooms were okay, that the house is okay. The gutter looks a little bent, but we were lucky it feel on an angle like it did. We were also extremely lucky the other tree landed sideways in the yard not directly on the house. I spoke very briefly with their Grandma and she soon left as I took the kids inside to see that their things were alright. She did say my son had a very difficult time with the storms, that he was quite upset.
Later, as the kids were talking about the storms at their dad's place, my son was saying his dad was teasing and scaring him. He said he ran downstairs to hide from the storms but they laughed at him. When we were outside and he was asking me who is going to cut the trees down? He asked if he could be gone because chain saws scare him. That once daddy turned on one of his really loud ones and was teasing him with it, but that's not okay, because I could have really been hurt! I agreed it wasn't okay and told him he would not be hurt by any that fix our trees. We were outside in the light rain looking at all sides of the trees, when my parents arrived. I did call them as soon as the kids were in the house and they were going to be on their way they had said. My dad thought the gutter and possibly the trusses? inside the roof might need to be fixed, but didn't think it would fall into the house any further tonight. The kids were so scared to sleep in their rooms, that at first they wanted to go over to grandma and grandpa's to sleep, but after remembering my son is being picked up at 7:30 for a baseball clinic, they decided they could stay here and my son would sleep in my bed. My daughter, convinced she'd be kicked out of the bed by her brother, dragged her mattress, blanket, pillow into my room to join in the sleepover. Only the rain and storms didn't stop and as my daughter said, after coming out to the family room unable to sleep, "Mom, I usually love the thunder and lightening, but now I dont' like the lightening so much anymore. I don't want it to hurt anymore trees." She stayed out with me through the evening news, and among other things she was tiredly rambling about, she did say something about her dad and her grandma talking about daddy's new job for the company that worked for his old company. That comment, I held onto with hope as I lay in bed tonight unable to sleep. Maybe there is hope that he did get another job. That my child support won't end and I won't have to figure out how on earth we are going to be able to afford this house, that now had a tree laying on the front of it. I don't even know where to call first tomorrow, but I do know I at least left a message after giving up being on hold with my insurance company. I know I'll take more pictures for them in the daylight tomorrow, and that things will look better as they always do in the morning.
Oddly, for the first time in a couple months, my ex-finance, that I had dated two summers ago, texted tonight, about the time my daughter was finally drifting off to sleep. I texted back to his "hey there", "Did you hear too? That on top of needing to buy new tires, that a tree landing on my house tonight?" He texted back some questions and later said he was sorry to hear about all of my bad luck. Funny thing is, as I was laying in bed over thinking his comment about the bad luck, I wasn't viewing it that way. It was actually probably a good thing the kids and I weren't in the house to hear the trees break, that we are all safe and that the trees didn't do more damage than they did. It is good that I somehow have been paying my insurance and that I've been through so many other challenges over the past few years that I practically laughed at this. Really? This I can handle. A tree on my house is nothing after hearing, 5 years ago on my 9th anniversary dinner, that my husband didn't love me, never believed he had loved me and wanted a divorce. Nope, not at bad as watching my daughter in tears talking to him on the phone while he was in the hospital about to go to jail, the night before her birthday. Not even hearing the news that he lost his job, which might mean once again my world would change drastically in many way. Tonight, I honestly didn't shed a tear, not yet at least. If I can make it through all that I have in the past five years, hearing from local police that my ex and his roommates are selling/doing drugs last summer, hearing my ex was going to jail, that he lost his job, hearing from myself, why on earth did I ever love/marry/think I was going to live happily ever after with him. Well, look at me now. A tree on my house and I'm still standing strong. Okay, not standing, slightly reclined typing at 2:20 AM on my laptop, but you know, not curled up in a ball crying like five years ago. Nope, that old me would hardly recognize the me tonight. That old me would be proud I think.
